We changed the title of our production from 'The Hairy Toe' to 'The Something' because we found that the original title was no longer relevant to our new plot. In our new plot, our characters were; a Duke and Duchess, a Presenter, a Ghost, a Blonde Bimbo and a Hoodie.
Here are our notes:
I was also asked to write about what happens to my character the first time that they split off in the haunted mansion:
We had to show our opening scene to the class. We were given feedback that our characters were good, but that our storyline was lacking as we were making it too complicated and confusing. We also needed at least one of our characters to be someone that the children could relate to. I felt that I needed to make my physicality stronger, which I could have done by better applying 'the tonic body'. I could improve on my reactions to the other characters. I also need to develop better characterisation, which I can improve on by improvising with my character.
Later we tried to adapt our story in an attempt to improve on the points raised in our feedback session. Our new plot involved the same characters, but the story line changed dramatically:
It begins with a 15-year-old Bimbo being adopted by a Duke and Duchess. They treat her horribly (live a slave), and when they hear the news about 'The Something' falling from the sky, they go off to find it without her, in a hope that it will give them enormous wealth. The Bimbo goes off crying and meets her new friend (Yasmin), who always carries a teddy bear around with her, named 'Mr Dibbles'. Yasmin and Stacey (The Bimbo) become great friends and set off to find 'the something' themselves. Yasmin acts like Stacey's conscience and reminds her to be a good person. By the end of the story, The Duke and Duchess learn to love Stacey. Stacey thanks Yasmin for all her help, but soon finds that she is the only person who can see Yasmin. Yasmin tells Stacey that Stacey wont need her anymore and disappears, leaving Stacey with Mr. Dibbles. When The Duke and Duchess leave Stacey alone, she hugs Mr. Dibbles and says, "Bye Yasmin."
Here is our plot 'The Something':
The story begins with the characters breaking into the haunted mansion. The Presenter interrupts them and the story rewinds to The Duke and Duchess in their house 4 hours earlier. The Duke and Duchess discuss dinner, turn on the radio and hear about 'the something' that has fallen from the sky. They decide to go on a quest to find it, where meet a Bimbo at a hair salon and a Creepy Hoodie in the forest. All of the characters head to the haunted mansion (where 'the something' supposedly is) and we return to the scene in which the characters break into the mansion. In the mansion they split up to find 'the something'. They each encounter a ghost and then they all bump into each other again. They are startled by a noise, all run away and split off again. This time The Ghost catches them all one by one and in a shocking twist, this was The Presenter's plan all along.
My character was the Creepy Hoodie. We decided that my character tries to be tough and scary, but really they are a big softy. For this reason, I introduced Mr. Dibbles into the story- an Australian teddy bear, who had a mind of his own and in ventriloquist-style, I would also be the voice of Mr. Dibbles.
We each wrote part of the script as homework. I was asked to write the scene in which the Duke, Duchess and Bimbo meet my character in the forest:
My character was the Creepy Hoodie. We decided that my character tries to be tough and scary, but really they are a big softy. For this reason, I introduced Mr. Dibbles into the story- an Australian teddy bear, who had a mind of his own and in ventriloquist-style, I would also be the voice of Mr. Dibbles.
We each wrote part of the script as homework. I was asked to write the scene in which the Duke, Duchess and Bimbo meet my character in the forest:
I was also asked to write about what happens to my character the first time that they split off in the haunted mansion:
We had to show our opening scene to the class. We were given feedback that our characters were good, but that our storyline was lacking as we were making it too complicated and confusing. We also needed at least one of our characters to be someone that the children could relate to. I felt that I needed to make my physicality stronger, which I could have done by better applying 'the tonic body'. I could improve on my reactions to the other characters. I also need to develop better characterisation, which I can improve on by improvising with my character.
Later we tried to adapt our story in an attempt to improve on the points raised in our feedback session. Our new plot involved the same characters, but the story line changed dramatically:
It begins with a 15-year-old Bimbo being adopted by a Duke and Duchess. They treat her horribly (live a slave), and when they hear the news about 'The Something' falling from the sky, they go off to find it without her, in a hope that it will give them enormous wealth. The Bimbo goes off crying and meets her new friend (Yasmin), who always carries a teddy bear around with her, named 'Mr Dibbles'. Yasmin and Stacey (The Bimbo) become great friends and set off to find 'the something' themselves. Yasmin acts like Stacey's conscience and reminds her to be a good person. By the end of the story, The Duke and Duchess learn to love Stacey. Stacey thanks Yasmin for all her help, but soon finds that she is the only person who can see Yasmin. Yasmin tells Stacey that Stacey wont need her anymore and disappears, leaving Stacey with Mr. Dibbles. When The Duke and Duchess leave Stacey alone, she hugs Mr. Dibbles and says, "Bye Yasmin."
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